Yay! 2009 is nearly over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let me offer my apologies for being so crap at blogging. I find twitter much quicker for putting my thoughts down on and being frank 2009 has been such a terrible year for me that I couldn’t be bothered to chart all the miserable things that have happened to me.

Anyhoo, on a lighter note, what has been good this year? Well, in June I finally got to see the live version of War of the Worlds. I know I’m a complete geek but it was awesome and also slightly worrying that I knew every single word to every single song. The O2 is an awesome venue and even though we were about 300 floors up, we could see everything really clearly. In August, I went to see Oliver at the Theatre Royal Drury Lane and discovered that it was designed for people who were 5 foot tall. I left with me legs numb and my mum feeling remorseful after thinking she was treating me. The show was great, but it’s hard to appreciate anything when you’re in pain. Finally last month I went to see La Cage aux Folles with John Barrowman. I know he is a major cheese, but he was excellent in the show and I really enjoyed it. Shame that two days later I was involved in a car crash and my beloved Reggie was written off ;-(

I’ve also published two novels – Two Become One and Winner Takes it All. I also wrote three, The True Tale of Jezebel Cole, Glittering Prize and My Funny Valentine, my latest one which I think will be called something different when I publish. As normal, sales of my books are pretty dismal, but I have a band of loyal readers and it’s a hobby I really enjoy and who knows, maybe one day someone famous will pick up my book in a second hand shop and rush to their agent, demanding this fabulous writer is contacted immediately.

I am looking back at the predictions I made at the end of 2008 and am going to see what was right and what was wrong (let’s face it, probably all of it).

Music – I see a return to disco. People’s lives are going to be miserable enough. I think uplifting music is going to be required – Umm, not entirely misguided. Electronic stuff like Lady Gaga, Little Boots, La Roux etc have become huge this year, all pretty poppy, all pretty disco-y!

Television – the death knell of reality TV. There have been too many scandals and allegations of fixing for it to survive much longer – well Big Brother died the death, people were bored with I’m a Celebrity and Strictly Come Dancing look pretty much on their last legs.

Late entry - Sean Pertwee to be named new Doctor Who – er no. It was Matt Smith (who? You ask)

Books – the rise of self published authors. I’m not just saying that because I am one but publishers are just taking on rubbish celebrities to ‘write’ novels and aren’t investing money in anyone with actual talent. The world is now the oyster for writers to create their own work and I think it’s going to flourish. – Yeah dream on, same old shit, same old Katie Price!

There is no point in making predictions for next year but I can guarantee that there is no way it can be anyway as shocking, celebrity death ridden, and controversial as this one.

Finally, my End of Year Awards* (using the same categories as last year)

TV SHOW OF THE YEAR – Miranda – yes it’s cheesy, it’s too 70’s, it’s all about Miranda but I loved this programme so much. It took me back to my childhood and made me laugh and there’s something about an overly tall, clumsy, largely built, unlucky in love, thirty something woman that resonates with me and I don’t know why!

Runner up : Ashes to Ashes and Torchwood – Children of Men.

HERO OF THE YEAR – Dannii Minogue – has picked herself up from being Kylie’s Sister and Cheryl Cole’s co-star and emerged in her own right. And most of all, proving that us ladies pushing 40 can take on whipper snappers in their 20’s and come out looking fabber!

Runner up : Miranda Hart.

FILM OF THE YEAR – Fish Tank. It’s the only film I saw this year that I clearly remember. That’s how shitty 2009 has been for movies.

Runner up : 2012 for sheer ridiculousnessD

DISAPPOINTMENT OF THE YEAR – Victoria Wood’s Midlife Christmas. I love Victoria Wood, but this just wasn’t funny. Too many people, just like every other sketch show that just rehashes BBC programmes. Made me reach for youtube and all the clips of Acorn Antiques.

Runner up : Liverpool’s performance in the premiership this season. Robbie William's comeback.

HYPOCRITE OF THE YEAR – MPs. They lecture us on tightening our belts and making do with the worst economic crisis in modern times and then get away with spending tax payers money on dirty films and second homes.

Runner up : Michael Parkinson.

MOST RIDICULOUS SOAP OPERA STORY OF THE YEAR – Yep, it’s Eastenders again and Darren Miller being exposed as the father of Heather’s baby. Ugh, wrong on so many levels.

Runner up : Anything that happens in Emmerdale – again!

MOST ANNOYING TV SHOW – The Alan Titchmarsh Show. This is the Daily Mail in televisual form.

Runner up : Big Brother MOST UNDERTATED SHOWBIZ PERSON IN THE WORLD – Matt Bellamy. I know Muse are huge and greatly loved, but come on, he’s a musical genius and should be president of the whole world.

Runner up : Graham in Coronation Street – he is a comic genius.

YES I’M BORED WITH YOU NOW – Katie and Peter. They’ve had their 15 minutes, please go away now. I’m sick of seeing you on the cover of every magazine and reading the ins and outs of every bit of their sordid marriage.

Runner up : David Tennant (although after tomorrow, I’m guessing we won’t see as much of him).

I’m off the crack open the champers now. Stick two fingers up to this horrid horrid year and hope the new decade brings happiness for us all.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!








*If Piers Morgan can do it, why can’t I?