I like driving in my car - it's not quite a Jaguar

Big weekend for me this weekend. I'm picking up my car and driving it home. Not a lot you may say. But given I've never driven a car that doesn't have dual controls before, it is a big deal for me. Because I'm still a learner I'm obliged to have a mate in the car with me, but I'll still be the one making the decisions. I'm so nervous I think I'm going to forget how to even drive!

More importantly - in terms of this blog - I am launching my new book Mrs Osbourne Regrets. An excerpt from it will be on lunchtime readers for everyone to look at and I'm going to start distributing them around. The first draft of The Pioneers is slowly progressing and after that my creative output is over for a few months. After Christmas I will starting work on finalising and publishing Two Become One and then Winner Takes All. I suppose I'd better try and fit in another driving test at some point too, otherwise I'll have to rely on chaperones all the time!

Went to see How to Lose Friends and Alienate people last night and in typical fashion both me and my friend totally disagreed with the critics and thought it was very good. It's basically just a rom com but I like both Simon Pegg and Kirsten Dunst so it worked out well. I really admire Kirsten Dunst - she has normal teeth! Most Hollywood actresses have great big white surgically enhanced gravestones, but Kirsten's teeth are so natrual she could almost be British!
Ciao for now

I'm glad it's the weekend

Well well well, it's been a funny old week. On Tuesday I took (and failed) my driving test. I'm not too down about it. Apparently 83% of people fail their first driving test, so I'm in the majority. Yesterday I got an award at work for being hard working or long suffering or something like that and the ceremony was a little daunting. I've sung in front of people so I'm not exactly scared about getting up in front of an audience but there's something weird about hearing good things about yourself then collecting your award, then at the end, having to stand and have photos taken. It was only as I was travelling (drunkenly) home on the tube that I realised to myself that if I ever make it as a writer, that it may happen to me again. If ever I was to win any sort of award, I'd have to endure that sort of thing and quite frankly I'm not sure I'd like all the publicity. But I'm running ahead with myself. I can't see Summerset or Mad About the Boy going anywhere near the Booker Prize sometime soon!

I may be finishing the year as still a learner driver (although I do hope to be buying a car soon to practice in) but I will enter 2009 knowing that at least 100 people have read my book and that it's currently in four UK libraries. It can only be onwards and upwards from here.

Mrs Osbourne is now finished and I've ordered one final copy to check for errors etc. A press release will be issued when it's for sale.

The Pioneers is also shaping up nicely, although I'm not dedicating too much time to it as next on my agenda is Two Become One. I'm so glad I've decided to go it alone without an agent. At least the acheivement is all my own. The same with my driving if I pass my test next time. I've had it with being ripped off by driving schools. Sometimes I think they deliberately put you forward for your test too early so you carry on having loads of lessons with them and paying extortionate amounts of money to hire the car for your test.
Ciao for now

Is Reality TV for me?

Autumn’s here and the TV has become awash with reality TV shows (decent ones that is, let’s forget the wash out that was Big Brother 9 this year). Sad as I am, I’m hooked on X-Factor and Strictly Come Dancing and I’m already adjusting my social life so I’m in on a Saturday night. For my American readers, the X-Factor is similar to American Idol and Simon Cowell is one of the judges (Leona Lewis) was discovered on it, and Strictly Come Dancing is our version of Dancing with the Stars. I like SCD because it’s always fun to see celebrities make idiots of themselves. The ones like Jessie ‘Jelly’ Wallace who are so desperate to win are hilarious. The X-Factor is rather like a guilty pleasure. I know the person who wins isn’t ensured a huge career and that it’s all very contrived, but I still love watching it. Some of the contestants this year were pretty rough looking during the auditions so it’ll be fascinating to see them once they’ve had the stylists go to work on them.

At the moment I’m backing gobby, former drug dealer Rachel to win. She hasn’t been equipped with an off switch and acts like a star before she’s even made it, added to this she’s got a great voice (although is a complete facsimile of Amy Winehouse) and if I was a betting woman I’d put her in at least the top three. First to go will be one of Louis’ groups. My money’s on the appallingly dressed Girl Band.

I heard rumours there was going to be an X-Factor style show for authors, hosted by Simon Cowell’s brother. I’m not sure I’d have the guts to enter it. Being rejected by agents etc in the privacy of my own home is one thing, but in front of millions of people is another altogether. Also, how do you make it interesting? Maybe they could dramatise bits of the novel to so people could get a feel for it. Also, I’m not sure I’d want to win something like this anyway (like I would!) as you would forever have the stigma as being the person who won the talent show. Still, if I sold a million novels off the back of it I wouldn’t be complaining.

I received the first version of Mrs Osbourne today. As usual it needs some work done to it, but fortunately on first looking, it appears to be in the layout rather than the words. I will be publishing it on lunchtimereaders once I’m happy with it.

One last thing. Why has Pizza Hut changed its name to Pasta Hut so it sounds healthy? Like eating loads of pasta covered in cheese and goo is any healthier than eating pizza.

Ciao for now x

Bookcrossing

I’ve registered Summerset on Bookcrossing. This is a crazy scheme where you log your book onto this website and then leave it somewhere. The next person to pick it up then logs this online in the form of a journal. I know it sounds weird, but it’s good publicity. I’m attaching a link to the website so you can check it out. But can people leave good suggestions? I was thinking of leaving it in a book shop but I’ve a feeling I’ll get caught on CCTV and will be wanted for littering or something. And I think you can forget leaving it on a bus because knowing London Bus Drivers, they’ll probably think it’s explosive and will cause a major incident.

Suggestions please….

http://www.bookcrossing.com/

Karen's knowledge of Music isn't as great as she thought it was!

Firstly, I have decided not to get an agent. I’ve thought long and hard about it and weighed up the pros and cons and have decided to go it alone. Yes, an agent could get me a publishing deal. But what does that mean exactly? That at least 35% of my sales go to other people when I’m the one who does all the work myself. At least doing it my own way I get to keep all the takings myself. Maybe sometime along the line I’ll change my mind, but for now I’m flying solo.

On another note, with my weird Roxy Music thing at the moment. I always thought Glass of Champagne was by Roxy Music and actually it was by Sailor (top song), and the last scene of the first episode of Ashes to Ashes plays out with a really cool song, and I thought it was Japan and bought the greatest hits of Japan and it was a load of crap and I never found that song. Then, whilst watching the docu on Roxy, they played Same old Scene and I thought ‘hang on, that’s the song at the end of Ashes to Ashes’ and it is. So I thought Sailor was Roxy Music and Roxy Music was Japan.

Talking of that scene in Ashes to Ashes, I think there is something sexy the way Gene pours the wine for Alex without her asking. Don’t ask me why, I’m a strange person. But if you want to watch it, here it is.

Ciao for now Kx

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qvj2B6NGKCA

Same Old Scene

Heard from the literary agent. What a surprise, Two Become One isn’t the sort of thing they can find a market for! This comes on the same day I received an email from Hampshire Library saying they’re going to accept a donated copy of Summerset. So that will be at least three libraries in the UK that will have my book in by the end of the year. Mrs Osbourne will soon be on the shelves and I’m asking myself why I even need to find an agent, why don’t I just carry on as I am?

The itch to write is starting in me. I found writing Mrs O quite limiting because it wasn’t much more than a short story. But I want to get stuck into a proper novel over the winter. I’ve also got to do Two Become One and Winner Takes it All, but The Pioneers is starting to take shape in my head.

I almost must mention that I have only just discovered a song called In Every Dreamhome a Heartache by Roxy Music. It is a really sinister song about a lonely, rich man’s love for his inflatable doll. Me being me it has sparked so many ideas for a crime book involving a sicko and his love for dolls. I truly am going to become like Barbara Cartland, knocking out a new novel every 2 hours!

Ciao

Thomas Hardy vs Jordan

Still not much news. Mrs O is about to go to my trusty editor for some proof-reading etc, then I will be checking it myself once more. By the time it's all printed and I'm satisfied, I should have my car, so I think I will build up my driving experience by touring around the M25 dropping off copies of Mrs Osbourne Regrets!

I've also ballsed up on Mad About the Boy. I accidently pressed 'create revision' on Lulu.com last night and now it's been set back because it thinks I've made changes, so it will be Christmas before it's distributed properly. Still, Mrs O will be out and about by then so it will all tie in nicely.

I watched a documentary on Thomas Hardy last night. He was a happy fellow wasn't he? I confess I haven't read any of his books but after watching this docu I think I will, but I'm not sure which one to start with. I think Jude the Obscure is too bleak and Tess of the D'urbervilles has been done to death so I will probably go for Far from the Madding Crowd. It did please me to discover that Hardy paid £75 to have his first book published - I haven't even paid that for Summerset or Mad About the Boy! And given this was around 1870, that's the equivalent of about £3000 today I would imagine. Apparently it took him five years to gain any sort of success and he started out by giving away free copies to his friends. Amazing, Thomas Hardy had to give away his books and pay a fortune to get published and yet Jordan is out-selling JK Rowling with her ghost-written rubbish. What a hippy dilly crazy world as the Frank and Walters sang.

I also want to briefly mention to UK viewers that on Living at 9pm on a Sunday is a show called The Underdog Show where 'celebs' train rescue dogs with a hope of getting them a home. Lesley Joseph (Dorian from Birds of a Feather) has a little terrier called Louise and it is the spitting image of Sally, my first dog. I want the number of that dog's agent! I want it to play Sheppie when the inevitable adaptation of Summerset is made (got to think positive here).

Enough ramblings. I've cut out alcohol, chocolate, cheese and caffine from my diet in order to avoid migraines. I'm also eating a magnesium rich diet and the change is making me a bit of space cowboy at the moment. Will be back on earth soon, I promise.